A Beautiful and Remarkable Life: My Eulogy and Memorial To Vickie's Mother

Betty Huffhines Combs Greene Rowland, age 82, of Quanah, TX, died Tuesday March 1, 2011, in Wichita Falls Texas.
Betty was born May 30, 1928 in Jackson County, Oklahoma, daughter of the late Herbert and Edna (Johnson) Huffhines. She was a longtime resident of Quanah and a homemaker and farm wife and had worked in the community at Leader Department Store, Quanah Memorial Hospital, and the Hardeman County & District Clerk’s Office. She was a member of the Quanah Church of Christ. She was preceded in death by a sister Marie Ellison in 2001; Two Sons-In-Law, Richard Hamilton Clarkson, August 13, 1982; and Kenneth Melton August 21, 2009.
Betty is survived by her husband Eugene Rowland of Quanah TX; three daughters, Vickie White, Debra Faris, Jan Melton, all of Quanah; and one son Edward Combs of Quanah. One Sister, Mary Stepp of Bay City TX and one brother Tommy Huffhines of Quanah.
Betty was blessed with nine grandchildren and four great grandchildren; three step grandchildren and three step great grandchildren. A step grandson, Scott Beck died in 1995. Three step daughters, Linda Hollenbaugh of Quanah, Judith Ball of Terrell TX, and Vickie Nan Ball of Lubbock TX;

A Beautiful and Remarkable Life

As I have said earlier to my daughters and others, when I first came into Betty’s home and life as a guest of her daughter Vickie, I found two things to always be present…an open Bible and Betty’s radiant smile. Both have brought light to Vickie and I and all the family throughout our lives.
To speak of Betty, we must speak of an extraordinary lifetime of what seemed to be 3 different and contrasting lives telling one remarkable story.
First, in 1946 came a headlong leap into a life full of youthful dreams marrying RD Combs. Those years were full of excitement and wonder and moves to Oklahoma and Amarillo and El Paso and back to Quanah, but life wasn’t as sweet as it seemed at first look. And so it ended in September 29, 1958. But, she wrought out of that time four blessings of her life that were her great treasures and are treasures today, Vickie; Debra; Jan; and Edward.
Secondly, on May 2, 1959 she married Ross Greene which began a life of re-building dreams that had not yet been realized and establishing a home that had not yet been set on a proper foundation. It was a time when she could begin to breathe and begin to be a wife and mother and everyone came back together as a family. These were those “sunshine years” every family holds so dear, when the memories are so rich and so vivid…and we lived them together with her in the sunshine of her smile until Ross’s death on November 18, 1992.
And thirdly, on November 27, 1999 Betty found loving companionship with Eugene Rowland and they happily shared married life for 11 years and 4 months. Each of them was a faithful companion and caregiver to the other in difficult times, and they shared many happy times traveling and enjoying life while reflecting on the lives and activities and marveling at the accomplishments of their children and grandchildren and great grandchildren.
I could go on and on and on and not recount all the wonderful events that we as family have experienced with Betty – and what fun we’ve had - but there just would not be enough time in one afternoon to recall the wonderful stories we all have to share from our life with her. And indeed, I have even heard friends say “Oh, I want to be a part of your family” because of Betty’s loving spirit for fun which drew people to her. Isn’t that a wonderful testimony to the life that she lived? Each of us will have the coming years to enjoy and share our fond remembrances. So in closing let me simply summarize in this way.
Knowing Betty for a lifetime and saying that her home always had an open Bible I’m sure it was often open to the verse 1 John 4:16 (ESV) and its phrase God is Love…for she showed the love of God in her life to everyone around her. "So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him." Or perhaps it would have been opened to Gal 5:22 (ESV) for indeed she showed those fruits of the Spirit in her life from day to day of love and joy to everyone around her. "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, "
And looking back across her life we see the reality of Jobs’ statement in Job 23:10 (ESV) as he speaks of God… "But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come forth as gold."
And I appeal to each and every one of us: honor that beautiful smile and that beautiful spirit and that openness to Gods’ Word in our lives each day by showing Christ-likeness in how we live… worthy of the high calling of God.
1 Corinthians 13:13 (ESV) "so now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love."


Father we come to thee for comfort and strength, and to thank you for Betty who has been such a light in our lives. And Father we ask Thy blessing upon everyone who attended her in this time of her illness and passing whether a friend with a kind and encouraging word or a nurse or a physician with attention and care and treatment to help her and her family in this journey. To Thee be the honor and the glory.


In Jesus Name I Pray…

Sounds of Change

It was early morning before sunrise when I heard the first fall train roll through town and it shook my memory of past season changes. When the seasons begin to change from summer to fall the air carries the sounds with more intensity. The steel wheels against the rails and the warning blasts of the horns and the roar of the diesel engines make it sound as if it the tracks are running right through the house with you. All at the same time it's furious frightening and funny. It makes me remember the times all us boys would sleep at Charlie and Wanell's when their house was on McClelland street. The room they put us in was no more than 50 yards from the old railroad switching tracks and we might as well have been riding the rails we were so close to moving switch engines and cars as they moved through the night.
It was the difference in sound that aroused a sense of anticipation and after drifting in and out of sleep and thought for a while longer I couldn't resist getting up and sitting outside under the oak for my morning coffee. And just as I anticipated, the air was still warm with summer, but different in its finish. The air moved across my face and when it passed it left an unmistakably cool edge that served notice that not many days or weeks ahead the northern storehouse would overflow with cooler and cooler and finally cold air. As I recalled this local signal of seasons changing, I thought of what was passing and what may come and how little control I have over the events that require us to live on their terms.

Mama, Don't Let Your Baby Grow Up To Be This Cowboy...

When I first noticed the black pickup truck it was on my mainstreet, but I would say with confidence that there is or soon will be a similar truck with the same sentiment expressed publically on your mainstreet. It read, "Pro Bull Rider, Bulls or Cowgirls, I Ride 'em All". And, I am also confident that the driver of the pickup truck felt he was stating what he considers the obvious fact that he must be of desirable breeding stock with a high average performace characteristic profile. However, experience teaches that it's not nearly as important to last only for the 8 second ride that this whipper-snapper brags about, as it is to be the "Best All Around Cowboy" over a lifetime!

A'Twitter

Expressions change in our language. So, now if we are all a'twitter about something we may not only be excited about it but we may feel compeled to tweet to our followers about whatever has set us all a'twitter. I am not sure but I think this writing would qualify as a twitter message. Would a follower please confirm?

I'm sure I will want to tweet from time to time; so, only in the spirit of humor I would offer my personal definition of adult twitter as a social network of adults interacting at the level of a group of junior high students.

Holy Coyote Biting Baby Bottoms, Batman!

No one had to say the 24 hour news cycle is insatiable. It seemed a joke at first, yet the story spoke about our lives and times.

California...Playground Park designed and built to promote a natural hills setting.

Mother not on site...Nanny attending children.

Coyote population adapting...Human population encroaching.

Friend giving interview on behalf of the mother...major networks clamouring for the human interest story.

Baby bitten on the buttocks by a coyote.

Perhaps it is news.

Unexpected Latenight Highlight

This holiday season was so enjoyable and satisfying. And as I was waiting for the New Year to reverberate through the world's time zones and finally reach New York and onto Quanah Texas I began to reflect on what I considered to be the defining moment of 2007. I had thought of poignant moments and a life-altering moment and embarassing moments and heart-warming moments. And then it happened as it often does, the present trumped all the reflection and pensive considerations. Vickie, whom I thought had drifted towards the New Year in peaceful slumber, let out a delightful laugh, and said "I can't believe you quoted Bob Dylan in Bible class yesterday morning!" And all of a sudden we were both lying there laughing as I tried to explain how well I thought his song Gotta serve somebody made the point of my lesson. So there it was...the perfect defining moment; laughing out of 2007 and into 2008.

Why Is It Always Why?

The nature of mankind is inquisitive. It's an intrinsic characteristic, and unless it is stifled by some force acting on our personality and mind, it will be a part of who we are as individuals. And I think it is always there even if stifled. I picture it like one of the species of frog or turtle that lies underneath the ground in a state of suspended animation for long periods of time until it is brought back to activity when water reaches it in its appointed time. It's there, but it needs that spark to spring back to life. And, I see this inquisitiveness filling out a broad spectrum from a casual and occasional whimper of why, to a thunderous God speaking to Moses on the mountain type of attention demanding quest to know why. Now I think this variety of intensity of why certainly relates to the variances of people and personalities. And in my case my why-range dances out on the spectrum where the crescendo can at times be deafening. So, not surprisingly, I've got to know why! "Because I say so" just never fit in my kit.



And so...off we go as if to know, and if you get there first don't let me know. As you may have guessed, I must try and figure out why you were able to get there first.

"Polypidelic", Man!

I didn't want to argue with the nurse, especially since she was going to be assisting on my procedure. I just wanted her to help me remember the name of that movie. I thought it had Frankenstein in the title I whispered, but I was trying not to let the doctor hear that part since it might color his performance, which involved me in what I can only describe as the unfolding of a very delicate script with the beginning at the end. But I could tell my nurse was getting a little miffed as soon as I told her she even looked like Cloris Leachman in the movie. I don't recall exactly what she explained she was putting in my IV, but it was merely milliseconds until I was directing my own movie, oblivious to what else was going on for the next half hour or so. Suddenly, I was telling them if they could just dial in Texoma's Oldies to go with their drugs I would be hanging out with them over the weekend; and, asking Frau Blücher if the ceiling would open to harness the lightning as the gurney was rising skyward. And soon I learned the reality of what the establishment had been telling us when we were younger and headstrong...people can give you drugs and can do things to you that you can't even remember.

Trip Trauma and Trip Karma

Once I begin thinking of all the Trip stories it's hard to let them go without recounting another one.

Like how Trip became traumatized to loud and sudden noises and will forever be frightened of thunderstorms. When Trip was a very young dog, probably less than one year, he and Angie lived in a house on the edge of a lake about 30 feet below a steep and shear cliff. One summer afternoon a very young girl whose parents lived in a house on the cliffs edge above where Angie's house was located was playing and exploring. Soon she was behind the steering wheel of an old abandoned truck near the cliffs edge, and as she was imagining driving this old truck she managed to mash the clutch in and allowed the truck to roll uncontrollably over the edge of the cliff. The truck came crashing down the thirty foot cliff and landed upside down on its top near Angie's house and Trip's outdoor enclosure (please note the PC "enclosure", rather than the tacky word "pen", as I am working through my negative Trip Karma). Thankfully, the young girl recovered from her scrapes and bruises without any serious consequences. But Trip was not so lucky. He is traumatized to this day by that sudden crash and noise and is unable to keep from cowering in a corner everytime a thunderstorm rolls through the area.

But now to the Karma.

I had always thought that since I was building fence on the ranch when I was diagnosed with Testicular Cancer that fence building was a cause of cancer (not very scientific or logical I know, but it's one of the ways I deal with the randomness of it). And I had never made any connection between Trip's "surgery" and mine until I watched a few episodes of Earle on television. And then, there it was, clear as a cold winter night. I remembered recommending to Angie that she should consider having Trip "fixed" in order to mellow out his temperment and curb his enthusiasm. Of course, it wasn't the fence building that caused the cancer that led to the surgery, it was Trip Karma. So, now I'm on a quest to make it up to Trip somehow, to get the karma right. An implant maybe? They do that now you know. One thing I can do though, stop calling him by that Spanish nickname I gave him - "no mas dos"...even though in fun they still call me "uno". That's got to be good karma.

I Sent Trip To Boot Camp

Boot camp is a place. When I first heard the word boot camp it was a term that got its meaning from the war years. It described the anvil where the military took green young boys and forged them into fighting men. A noble process of passage into manhood. But like many words it has morphed and serves us with a variety of other meanings. Today it can mean a resort where people go to solve a weight problem. Or, a juvenile detention facility where society hopes to accomplish a redemptive process for troubled young men and women.

And so, I thought I would send Trip to boot camp. You may think it a stretch, but it seemed a good fit for Trip and for me. He was at that critical stage in life where he had not yet shed that puppy adolescence and had all that bottled up enthusiasm for life in a gangley and powerful one-hundred-pound frame. Lovable yes, manageable no. And since Angie had left him in my care I thought the timing was perfect and my purpose noble. Of course, finding suitable boot camp facilities in the Quanah area required some imagination. Eventually I settled on the idea that Trip would make a good farm dog and I soon found a local farmer-rancher who needed a watchdog at his remote and uninhabited farmhouse. So Trip was off to boot camp. This has got to be one of my greatest feats of "win-win" solution making. Or so I thought. Almost immediately phone reports were pouring in of a large black dog ranging across the western areas of Hardeman County. Miles apart and away from his new farm home and guard dog duties. And soon reports were coming back to me that Trip was a tireless pursuer of porcupines and skunks and who knows what else. The skunks were a lesson learned quickly; however, as strange as it seems, Trip found the porcupines irresistible. Trip would be found pawing his face which was swollen twice its normal size from the embedded quills, whimpering at his self-inflicted wounds. Not just once, not just twice, but at least three times Trip had to be taken to the vet by his new guardian to have the wounds treated. And so it was that three times turned out to be the charm as they say for Trip. His new guardian declared that Boot Camp was not the right place for Trip. He was just too enthusiastic and energetic to be a companion for the young grandchildren he explained and the farm was just too much freedom for Trip's own good. So Trip returned home to my back porch. His spirit was undiminished and physically he was thin and lank and scarred and muscled; with a toothy smile that said he had graduated from Boot Camp and that I better not think of asking him to go anywhere other than the back porch...or home with Angie. And so that is how this episode ended. Of course, Trip is more wary now of who I introduce him to and he gets very nervous and agitated when Angie leaves him alone with me. But, with the same bent he had in chasing porcupines, he keeps coming around with tail wagging and eyes that say all he wants is a friendly pat on the head and that all is forgiven. The same I expect of many that get home after Boot Camp.